B-Boy Limping

Scenes from “Portlandia: The Tour”
January 22, 2012, 1:24 am
Filed under: Comedy, Film

At Bowery Ballroom tonight.

Fred Armisen and the adorable Carrie Brownstein, doing what they do:

Guest performer Kyle MacLachlan:

And Annie Clark (St. Vincent) covering Pearl Jam’s “Black”:

God I want her shirt.

What should I buy from the Damien Hirst Spot Paintings gift shop?
January 22, 2012, 1:07 am
Filed under: art, New York

There’s so much to choose from!

Should I go with a t-shirt?

Or a mug for m’ cubicle? There’s a surprise spot a the bottom for when I finish m’ tea:

Never mind you guys, I think I found it:

Just what every b-boy needs. Cuff links! And what a steal for only $28.

At the Gagosian, 1/21/2012.

These two should date
January 21, 2012, 9:59 am
Filed under: art, Hey Ladieesss!

“Old Self: Portrait of the Artist as He Will (Not) Be,” circa 2010, by Evan Penny. Currently hanging in the Crystal Bridges Museum of American Art, Bentonville, Arkansas.

“Stephanie” (Seymour) a.k.a. “Trophy Wife”, 2003, by Maurizio Cattelan. Commissioned by [husband] Peter Brant, hanging in the Guggenheim as part of the Cattelan retrospective until, oh, tomorrow.

I think they’d have a good time together, don’t you? Poor Stephanie deserves a man who doesn’t put her on display. Literallyyyyyyy

Also, you guys, WE COULD HAVE BOUGHT HER. Next time.

Husband Hunting: The Professional Bullriding Tournament, Day 2

At Madison Square Garden this weekend.

Guys, look at all the cowboys!  And such gentlemen.  Not one minute after we walked in, two lads in tight jeans offered to get us drinks from the open bar.

But they made it too easy.  I need a chase. First I had my eye on this vision in blue:

But he was way more into his beer than me.

Then this stud caught my eye:

But I think he was with the lady next to him (or dude behind him). Either way, he was taken.

This guy was too all about business:

And this dude just wanted to joust:

This guy’s built Ford tough (and you need to be, to put up with me, amirite fellas?), so he could totally work…

But. You guys. I think above all I need someone that can make me laugh. Someone that doesn’t take himself too seriously.

Someone that can dance:

And can help me with my makeup:

Maybe I found him?