B-Boy Limping


I wish Venus Williams would design like, real dresses
August 30, 2011, 12:00 pm
Filed under: Hey Ladieesss!, New York | Tags:

Because this is SO ADORABLE, right?

And the back!! With lace! I can’t even stand it I want it so bad.

Tony Bennett loved it, of course (see if you can find him).

And Bridget Moynahan would love it but she was too busy drinking all the booze.*

(A lady after my own heart.)


Federer can’t understand why nobody cares about what he’s wearing.

Sigh.  BECAUSE IT’S ALL GRAY, ROGER. THAT IS NOT INTERESTING.

At least Anna still loves you.

*Naaaah. She was signing them for charity.

[U.S. Open Day 1, 8/29/2011)



Husband Hunting: Hurricane Irene Edition
August 28, 2011, 6:50 pm
Filed under: Hello boysssss, Husband hunting, Nature!, New York

Some folks think a hurricane is the perfect time to find a hurricane boyfriend, but I need more than someone to make out with when I’m stuck in my borough. I need someone to protect me from falling tree branches:

Or provide for me when all the bread is gone from the grocery store:

YOU GUYS I NEED M’ BREAD FOR M’ SAMMIES AND M’ FRENCH TOAST.

I need a Hurricane Husband.

So, today I went out looking for one in Astoria Park. And I found some good candidates!

I like this guy ’cause he’s a daredevil. But he’s too much of a loner.

This guy has a sweet ride. Which he’s using to get away from me.

The one in the red is hot, but he’s always with his bros.

Never mind, because I think I found my winner:

Because, duh. He has his own boat.



Scenes from the Hipster Puppy Pageant


You like my emo butt stars?

Well I dig your retro phone, mama.

I go both ways…

…if you know what I mean.

Ironic Lampshade is the name of my band.

I wonder if anyone can smell my fart.

BORED.


DRUNK.

HIGH.


WHAT IS LIFE.


I just took a dump over there I’m so hipster American Apparel on my butt aaaaaaahhhhhh.

My headphones aren’t even plugged in.

Goin’ to a rave right after this.

[whispering] Fuck you.

I only know three chords but I make up for it with style.

Hey girrrrl, wanna get out of here and grab a bite? I brought my own PBR.

Fine, whatever, look, I have a show I’ve got to get to.

No, it’s cool, you’re not on the list anyway.

[whispering] Fuck you.

[Hipster Puppy Pageant, powerHouse Books, 8/25/2011]



One of these things is not like the others
August 25, 2011, 8:55 am
Filed under: art, New York, sometimes i like to do things with dolls

Can you spot it?

Sad cyclops.

Portrait sculpture at the Noguchi Museum.



maybe it’s because i’m out of touch
August 22, 2011, 9:06 am
Filed under: Nature!, Public Service Announcement | Tags:

But I had to look up what K2-Spice was.

My being old or whatever aside, I still think they could have made a smoother transition in the ad. I mean, it’s a pretty big leap now, right?

My suggestion:

R2-D2 was (um, is?) kid friendly

RJD2 makes the kids dance

R.J. Spice (who exists, I looked it up) means nothing to kids

Scary Spice (not a necessary link but I think it’s appropriate in this case) is kid-scary

K2-Spice is KID DEADLY.

There you have it! Much more logical.

Yr WELCOME, drugfreeNJ.org.



It’s the Rapture
August 21, 2011, 10:47 am
Filed under: Music, New York | Tags:

Music Hall of Williamsburg, 8/20/2011



Cut Copy at Prospect Park
August 12, 2011, 6:45 am
Filed under: Hello boysssss, Music, Nature!, New York


Can you take the picture pleaaaasssseeee…


… So I can get back to my dancing?


(Wind Machine)

8/11/2011



Husband Hunting, pt. 3
August 10, 2011, 4:57 pm
Filed under: Hello boysssss, Husband hunting, Music, New York, Weird Science | Tags:

At the Horrors show at Webster Hall last night, which coincided with the release of their latest Skying.

First I went for the lead singer, because, duh:

But he was so moody, ya know?

So then I looked to the  drummer, because they’re very good with rhythm,  and that is appealing.

But I couldn’t  get behind the hat.

So then I thought, maybe the bass player?

Nah…  I think I’d rather just borrow his wardrobe.

But wait, how could I miss this dude? And his hair!

Such pretty hair. I think I’d be into it more than him.

So then my eyes wandered off the stage, over to Justine, behind Justine, to Nick Zinner of the YYYs…

But he seemed a little shy. I mean, can you even tell it’s him?

Back on track, I decided I needed someone that took some pride in their appearance. Someone who could easily pass for an accountant if need be, and fool my parents.

Someone preferably who could play the tambourine.

Guys, maybe I found him?



Das Racist at PS1 Warm Up
August 1, 2011, 9:18 am
Filed under: Hello boysssss, Music, New York


“Das racist!”

Choppin’ it up in the VIP section.


If you ever see them on the street, ask them to tell you about the time they got snubbed by Ad-Rock of the Beastie Boys, even after they bought him ramen.

Saturday, July 30, 2011