B-Boy Limping

Reviewers have the gross tendency to refer to Au Revoir Simone’s Heather D’Angelo, Erika Forster, and Annie Hart as some sort of magical three-headed wet-dream-inducing synth-pop siren. Sure, they harmonize, have similar haircuts, and sometimes speak in the plural “we.” And maybe they have a little bit of a Lisbon girls vibe about them. But to see them perform is to recognize three distinct styles, none of which are suicidal. And none of which, thank god, are Kirsten Dunst.

To pay homage to these ladies I’m starting an Au Revoir Simone cover band that exists only on this blog. We don’t play instruments or anything, we just wear the ‘stache and occasionally go to Au Revoir Simone concerts.

Okay fine, we’re not really a cover band. We’re more like three ladies with an affinity for a purple stuffed mustache who had a little bit of sangria and went to ONE Au Revoir Simone concert at the Bowery Ballroom last Saturday.

Anyway, we’re called Hello Simon.

The players:

Sasha will play Erika, the quiet one. She writes songs about babies and home design which, thanks to her, Hello Simon has the market cornered on. Hit song: “Your Carpets Don’t Match Your Drapes But Your Man Parts Are Appealing.” And my personal favorite: “Let’s Watch Project Runway And Make A Baby.” Just because I’ve actually said it.

Kari’ll play Annie, the “wacky” one. She wears her sunglasses at night and is the spokesperson for the group. We like it when she does interviews for us because she answers every question with “Are you talkin’?” Then she kicks the interviewer in the nuts and shouts “Not any more!”

And Dan’s Yankees shirt is standing in for me/Heather. I’m the demure one. It’s my blog, so deal with it.

And ta-da, the actual band:

You’d think three separate gals would mean three times as much wet dream fodder for reviewers, no? And isn’t that a good thing?

Heather, Erika, and Annie of Au Revoir Simone.